Not longer after creating a new Twitter profile for my productivity articles and more archaeological stuff the other day, I regretted it. It all started when I’ve been followed by the British Museum during an art week event last year, they followed me as @alicegreenleaf and I immediately felt uncomfortable, because they could now see all my fangirl rambles, LOTR live tweets and so on. I know, that the BM media staff won’t actually check out my profile, but I genuinely freaked out when a coworker of the library found me and added me on Twitter. I have nothing secret there, but the italian academic environment is not geek-friendly, you aren’t taken seriously if you enjoy/share geeky stuff, even my everyday life friends think that managing social media for Middle-earth News, for example, means playing all day long and procrastinate.
All this made me start having mixed feelings, I created a new profile, I regretted it, I thought about deleting it already and then I decided to self-impose a Twitter ban to myself for the whole month of May. I deleted the app from my phone and set up email notifications for mentions. It’s so hard being unemployed and constantly thinking about how you would appear to a possible future boss (especially in a country with a very outdated mentality).
But it’s not all. After 10 years of blogging (I started my very first Windows Live Space blog in 2007 after my family acquired our first laptop – the big computer was mainly used by my father for working and occasionally by me for school reasearches and The Sims) I feel tired of sharing, tired of all my many accounts on social media, of not-chronological feeds (I’m looking at you, Instagram). I think the best way to explain it is using Bilbo’s words.
I keep hearing everywhere that blogs are dead and I think it’s true in some ways. There is a new way of blogging, that’s all about SEO, stats, numbers and, yes, money. There is nothing wrong in doing what you love, but I’m tired of seeing advertisements everywhere to be honest. If you pay attention to it, Instagram is all about “rep search” and the perfect flatlay, thanks also to a random feed. It used to be a place to share your everyday adventures and, being things displayed in chronological order, it made sense. Now I see breakfast pictures in the evening and sunsets in the morning (from people with my same timezone), it’s a mess! The only one that’s still has a chronological feed is Twitter, but for me it’s like being in a super crowded room screaming to say something and nobody noticing it.
In the past, I would say myself “you’re just burned out, it shall pass”, but I think that “uninspired” is the appropriate word. The internet is saturated and I feel myself uninspired. I feel the need to start fresh, but I don’t know where to begin, so I end up not showing up anymore.
As I shared on my Instagram stories yesterday, I took only a single photo during this whole week, I will have a Project Life spread full of colorful cards instead of my own pictures. It’s not like I used to do and it’s annoying to me, because Instagram used to be my happy corner of the internet, a place where you could find me 24/7, the place where everything was beautiful, positive and joyful. It was my hobby.
I toyed with the idea of starting fresh with a new blog, to celebrate my 10 years of blogging, but I’m not actually sure it’s what I really want. I simply miss the old days and the inspiration I had.
This is not an announcement to say “The Geeky Burrow is closed, you can find me here and here now”, I’ll keep this blog as long as I’ll be able to afford the domain as a broke student, but I don’t exclude I’ll start something new on WordPress.com sometime soon, something very casual and easy to maintain, like from the smartphone app. Micro-blogging always fascinated me, but I never had a good relationship with Tumblr and I saved elirwyn.wordpress.com years ago as a placeholder (fun fact: it’s the name of my very first LOTRO character), maybe it would be the right time to start using it. Who knows?
Thank you for reaching the end of my 10 years of blogging rambles! You’re the best.